Seeking Greener Pastures (part 2): My first day at the University

As una know already, na school format I take cross carpet comot Naija. School resume for October, but I show for December, based on plenty money wahala, I literally sell everything wey I get, borrow join to take make this waka. Embassy set nearly dull me, dem say I don too late to resume school, luckily for me I been don inform my course coordinator say I go resume late. As embassy wan do anyhow, I fire email to the woman, she immediately fire email to embassy. Na so dam take knack me d visa. The course coordinator woman really try for me.

So, as I fall in the first day, I jam one Naija bros, e tell me were d woman office position. Based on our Naija orientation, I just say make I go hail her thank you for every every. As I reach her office, I introduce myself, the woman sharply welcome me, still offer me tea. Hmmmmm, see levels, tea for school, I sharply down d tea. As I begin thank the woman d typical Naija way "I appreciate your effort, God bless you, blah blah blah". The woman just stop me, she say no need for all the thank you. Her response was " I was just doing my job". I trip, Naija mentality don finish me.

I enter class to learn book, Oboy, the class off my spirit. Classroom dey like MTN office, everywhere stew (Mr Jollof, 2018). Projector, all man position with their laptop, wifi connection fast pass glo and mtn connection join together. As me no carry laptop, I position for back seat. Walahi, Naija education no follow, technology go first humble u for d abroad. See instructor (lecturer) wey get Phd, small girl, if no be condition, I suppose don put that one for house. When class end, I go block instructor to update her say I just show. See as she free with me, dey ask me how I dey settle in and if I know fit meet up, I no need do the exam. For here, you fit register the course and decided not to write exam, e no go affect your grade. I humble, na instructor just dey talk to me freely. If na for Naija, my Unilag lecturer go don abuse my generation. My people, na poverty dey make think say to get PhD na gold or you go need don old. For here, 27-30 year old don get PhD.

Well, I enter class back, introduce myself to the other class people, some Germans, Americans, Italian, Colombia, Brazil and Africans. The class na United Nations. Na so d Americaan babe say make we go for lunch before d next class. Walahi, that was one of the biggest mistake wen I make. We reach dere, chop finish, all my mind na say this babe na him dey pay the bill. As dam come to give bill, waiter ask getrennt or zusammen (meaning if we dey pay separately or together). Oboy American girl say separately. Chaiii, I begin ask myself who send me message, I check my bill, 15 euros (7,500 Naira), for small rice and grass wen no even gauge me. And as jjc I dey convert everything I spend into Naira. I no get choice, but to pay. Like say that one never reach, d American babe say I suppose tip the waiter, d bad eye wen I take look dem ehnnn, reach to kill d waiter, but d waiter no send. E wait collect every every.

My people, that day I learnt d hard way. When Oyibo tell u lets go for drinks or dinner/lunch/breakfast, he mean say hold ya money.

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Tags: Nigerian in Germany; pidgin; Naija living in Germany; pidgin blog; schooling in Germany; German waka